Etiquetteer Takes the Proust Questionnaire, Vol. 15, Issue 4

Apparently the late David Bowie once took the Proust Questionnaire, which inspired Etiquetteer to do the same, although Etiquetteer used the version that's on Wikipedia: Your favorite virtue: Situational awareness.

Your favorite qualities in a man: discretion, penmanship, pocket squares.

Your favorite qualities in a woman: elegance, "a soft, low voice as clear as silver and as perfect in articulation as the notes of a thrush" in the words of O. Henry, and the ability to freeze unwanted attention.

Your chief characteristic: Being a character.

What you appreciate the most in your friends: Promptness.

Your main fault: Finding fault.

Your favorite occupation: Conversation at table that doesn't concern table manners.

Your idea of happiness: A world in which everyone is properly dressed.

Your idea of misery: Walmart.

If not yourself, who would you be? J. B. West, Chief Usher of the White House; or Robert de Montesquiou, or Consuelo, Duchess of Marlborough.

Where would you like to live? Paris, Venice, and/or Budapest.

Your favorite color and flower: Blue/Jacqueminot roses and Malmaison carnations.

Your favorite prose authors: Edith Wharton, Emily Post, and Patrick Dennis.

Your favorite poets: William Shakespeare, Dorothy Parker, and Ogden Nash.

Your favorite heroes in fiction: Newland Archer, Dorian Gray, Paul in Willa Cather’s “Paul’s Case."

Your favorite heroines in fiction: Marmee in Little Women and the Marquise de Merteuil in Dangerous Liaisons.

Your favorite painters and composers: Painters: William Paxton, John Singer Sargent; Composers: Johann Strauss and Franz Lehar.

Your heroes in real life: my father.

Your favorite heroines in real life: my mother.

What characters in history do you most dislike: invading armies, whether military or shopping.

Your heroines in world history: Misia Sert, Dolley Madison, Dorothy Draper, and Eleanor of Acquitaine, who gave civilization the tablecloth.

Your favorite food and drink: macarons and champagne.

Your favorite names: Etiquetteer. Just Etiquetteer, not "The Etiquetteer."

What I hate the most: those who reject Perfect Propriety in the name of Personal Choice; they neglect the feelings of others.

World history characters I hate the most: Stalin.

The military event I admire the most: The Peace of Westphalia.

The reform(s) I admire the most: the defeat of the corset, the Repeal of Prohibition, and the demise of the formal leaving of calling cards.

The natural talent I’d like to be gifted with: the ability to snap my fingers (and be obeyed when doing so).

How I wish to die: punctually.

What is your present state of mind: cautiously optimistic.

For what fault have you most toleration: being called “The Etiquetteer.” One does not say, for instance, “The Cher,” or “The Beyoncé."

Your favorite motto: "I shall pass this way but once; any good that I can do or any kindness I can show to any human being; let me do it now. Let me not defer nor neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again." - Etienne de Grellet